Mining gems to share with your sons

diamondsI remember when I learned I was expecting and wanted so very much to have a son, the son of a farmer to carry on after dad. I wished, hoped, even prayed for a son for my husband. When my sister did one of those crazy “urinate in a cup and add it to Draino” experiments (or some other chemical—this mommy-brain can no longer remember), it turned the color for a daughter. I remember being so upset at first. Then we found out through an ultra-sound that it would indeed be a son. I cried! I still remember how happy I was to give my husband a son, though he had never mentioned a preference of the sex of our child. He is the only boy of four children and his father is the only boy of four children. I felt like I was doing my duty as a farmer’s wife and was so excited.

When our second child’s ultrasound displayed boy parts, I cried again:  another son; I must be some sort of queen! At the third ultrasound, I cried again…another boy? Really. I was so happy but at the same time was wondering if I had hoped too much! And, at the fourth ultrasound? Yes, more tears for yet another son was to join our family. Four boys. Four boys! What do I do with four boys?

While I am very thankful for my sons, I am daily reminded that I do not really understand boys and their ways. I do not understand why all air that passes from the body—in any way—is funny. Really? Yes, apparently it is. From my conservative husband to our  19 month old, they all laugh– every time. I don’t understand why they run, hop, jump and push when we COULD just walk. I do not understand why they all compete for attention and power over the rest of the family. But what I do know is that God knows. He understands. He will help me to love my boys and lead them toward Him.

Moms of boys…according to one report over 90,000 more boys are born each year than girls. This has been the trend, the report noted, since 1940! That’s a lot of boys and thus a lot of moms of boys out there. I started thinking about what it means to be the mom of a son and what God’s word says about moms of sons. I looked up Mommas of boys in the Bible to see if I could glean something from them. There are several moms presented but two caught my attention. One is from the Old Testament and her name is Jochebed. The other is from the New Testament and her name is Eunice. Both women show us what we need to be doing as Mommas of boys.

Jochebed was the mother of Moses. She was married to a man named Amram and was of the family of Levi. What I learned about Jochebed is that she knew her scripture and she acted on the facts of scripture. In Genesis 15:16 God, who is making promises to Abram (later Abraham) about the nation that will come out of him, tells that in the fourth generation the nation (Israel) would come out again from God’s judgments. The 4th generation…Levi is the first generation of the nation of Israel. Levi’s son is Kohath, the second generation. Kohath had four sons, one of them is Amram; he was in the third generation. Yep, the same Amram who is Moses’ daddy is in the 3rdgeneration. So, when Moses was born to Amram and Jochebed, he was the 4th generation of this nation. (Gen 6:16-20 shows the generations.) Moses would fulfill scripture. Also, during the time of Moses’ birth, Egypt’s pharaoh, who was holding the Israelites as slaves, started telling the midwives to kill all the Israelite baby boys when they were born so the slaves would not overtake the Egyptians (Exodus 1:16). When Moses was born, Jochebed saw that he was a “goodly child” (Exodus 2:2), and she protected him in the now famous Bible account of her hiding her son in bulrushes in a tiny basket-boat. She knew scripture and she acted on the facts of scripture. She knew that her son could fulfill that scripture and she helped to preserve him. Jochebed also, through a series of events, was able to nurse her own baby son and teach him who he was as an Israelite until he went to live with the daughter of pharaoh as her Egyptian son. Jochebed’s teaching would carry Moses through many days of his life. He was not a perfect man, but he knew who he was and who Jehovah God was.  Later in Moses’ life, he would follow God on his own. He would lead Israel out of Egypt and he would fulfill God’s scripture.

The second mom is only mentioned in one verse. Eunice is the mom of Timothy. Timothy is a helper and mentee of the Apostle Paul. In 2 Timothy 1:5, Paul tells us, “When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee [Timothy], which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois and thy mother Eunice, and I am persuaded that in thee also.” Unfeigned according to Webster’s 1828 dictionary is “not counterfeit; not hypocritical; real; sincere.” Timothy’s faith was real, sincere and not made up or put on. It was real. Wow, an unfeigned faith, isn’t that what we all want for our children? Paul notes that this faith was in generations of Timothy’s family. Timothy’s father was a Greek, an unbeliever, so Timothy learned scripture from his mom. She knew it because of her mom, Lois. The truth of scripture being passed from generation to generation does not happen without effort: our effort. I like that God included a mom teaching her son about the truth of God’s word. So, know we can do it, too.

As moms of boys in our society today, we need to be passing on the truth of God’s word. We need to be teaching our boys—and daughters too, for that matter—so they come to the realization that they are sinners and in need of God’s great love and salvation. Then we need to go further, teaching them to rightly divide God’s word so they know the parts of it that are written directly to them today verses and what was written to others for only our edification. We can do this, Moms, but that means we need to know scripture ourselves. We need to study God’s word, to mine out small gems of truth and know it. Teaching our children will happen as we go through the days and nights with them, not just at set times of study. We need to be ready to share gems of truth from God’s word. I know, Momma friend, that during sipping years and diaper years and runny nose years, it is hard. I am there with you. But, sweet friend, now is the time. Pick one gem from God’s precious word and add it to the treasure chest in your child’s heart. Do that often. Your son needs God’s word and you are the Mom to help him learn it.

A dear friend once told me that only sons can grow to be men of God. So, at our house, we are growing up men of God. We want men who will continue to mine out gems of truth to pass along to their children and grandchildren. God needs you, Mom, and you can do it!  Your son is worth it.

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My Day Off from the Boys: What I did while the boys were out

My Day Off from the Boys: What I did while the boys were outtrainThe other day my husband, The Farmer, took The Engineer, Farmer, Jr. and The Cowboy to a train show a couple of hours from our home.  They left before The Dancer and I got up and were gone most of the day.  A whole day without big boys to do whatever I wanted to do was here.  I could do whatever I pleased and have no one to ask me for things (The Dancer does not talk much really).  When The Dancer took a nap, I would be completely FREE to do whatever I wanted for myself and no one else.  I had the crazy feeling, “This is what it would be like if they went to school each day and I was just alone with The Dancer all day, by myself, with no other boys, just me and The Dancer, except during nap when it would just be me, alone.  I could go potty with no audience.at.all. This is going to be GREAT!”  (Yes, I know that I think in run-on sentences but don’t we all, really?)

So, what did I do…let’s see, what did I DO…what DID I do? This is where you are thinking, “She sat on the couch in her pjs and did nothing all day long!”  Actually, I decided I was going to take all the Christmas decorations down with no extra help and put them back into their bins. This is what NEEDED to be completed, so I bit the bullet and got started.

So, this day “off” I

  • brought down the bins from the attic with “non-Christmas items” and unpacked them
  • chased The Dancer away from these items; answered him when he asked where his brothers were
  • took down and started to pack the Christmas items back into said bins; thought about the boys & prayed for them
  • chased The Dancer away from Christmas items; answered him when he asked where his brothers were
  • gave The Dancer a snack; thought about the big boys again, missed them, & prayed for them again
  • packed more stuff in the bins
  • cleaned and put up non-Christmas items; called The Farmer to ask about the boys
  • stopped for a tea break and read a chapter of my book while The Dancer played cars at my feet
  • danced with The Dancer to music on the radio; prayed for The Dancer and his someday wife; missed my big boys
  • organized The Dancer’s clothes as he was moving up a size; answered him when he asked where his brothers were
  • packed up The Dancer’s clothes that were too small to pass on to a family member
  • thought about the boys again and yes, prayed for them again and for The Farmer that he was doing okay with them

On and on went my day, but while I got many items checked off my list, what I really did on my free day was miss my boys.   It isn’t that I am not a whole person without my boys.  It is more about the fact that I enjoy them.  I want to be around them.  Don’t get me wrong: there is fighting and arguing and melt-downs, and then there are problems with the boys too (he he).  Seriously, though, I want to be near them to train, teach, lead, and help them to grow into the men God wants them to be.

It was a good wake-up call for me as we are heading back into the second half of our home educating year and the winter blahs are upon us.  I do love my boys and I want to be with them.  Of course, outside time for them is a must (without me) to run off their “boy energy” as The Cowboy would say.

I wrote this post for myself, as much as for you, the parents of boys, to remind us that this is such a short, short time before our boys are moving on to jobs and life away from our homes.  ENJOY the time.

This year, my New Year’s Resolution is just that: Enjoy my Family.  I am often so very busy that I am checking off lists and making new ones.  I forget sometimes that I am doing everything for my family.  I do love them and I need to focus on enjoying the time with them.  We are never promised tomorrow with them.  Even when tomorrow comes, though, and it is followed by the tomorrow after that, soon next year and the next will be here.  Time truly is fleeting and time with our boys is short.  So this year, I am going to enjoy the boys!

Hope you can find a way to enjoy yours this day and tomorrow, too!

Enjoy the boys.

Who we are…

I thought it about time for you to meet the crew, since we here at 4theloveofboys are all about BOYS.  We have four sons, my husband (the Farmer) and I, and they are our eldest son, The Engineer; our second son, Farmer, Jr.; our third son, The Cowboy; and finally our baby, The Dancer.

The Engineer loves to figure out how things work, and is currently working on another “How Things Work” book.  Farmer, Jr. wants nothing more than to be JUST LIKE DAD.  He can often be found creating farm scenes and playing farmer.   He also likes to dress like dad…The Cowboy loves make believe.  He dresses up like cowboys, warriors, bad guys, good guys, trains, pretty much everyone!  He also likes to create with Legos and blocks. Finally, our dancer loves to dance and sing and play!  He enjoys life and I could learn a lot from his carefree spirit.  I am excited to be a part of their lives to see who they will become as they grow and learn.

That’s us: 4theloveofboys.  I will continue to add new posts as I figure out this blogging thing!  Come on back soon and see us!